It seems doomed to be  a less than merry Christmas for me. The neighbour is on the rampage. For the last month or so she has been making snarky remarks about the need to get my grass down. A situation of which I am well aware and have been working on for some time. Unfortunately the recent rain has caused that area which has been slashed to spurt back into growth and the whipper snipper has been less that helpful - taking up to ten minutes to build up speed and then losing torque when faced with the growth.

This morning I got stuck in at 8 which apparently caused offence, so as I worked my way down the side of the house I found a note carefully placed in a position that could not possibly have been achieved without entering the property and positioning it (ie, could you drop two sheets of a4 over a six foot fence on a breezy day and have them arrive with the blank sheet underneath and the wording on the top sheet clearly visible?). It drew my attention to the 'fact' that on Sundays it is illegal to start work before ten. So I stopped. I made the note into a paper plane and returned it pointing out that it was not illegal, albeit a breach of the nuisance regulations, but that entering my property without my permission is indeed illegal.

All good.

Then I went into town to clean the bank, visit a friend and call into the Supermarket. Where Psycho neighbour was queuing at the check out. And launched into me at full voice saying that in fact it was me who was entering her property and leaving cigarette butts lying around. Now in the unlikely event I was trespassing I think we can agree I would not be stupid enough to leave evidence lying around, and there is the small matter that I stopped smoking over  a year ago. A fact I drew to her attention, so still at full voice she said that it was 12 months ago that she found the cigarette butts. Naturally the entire community was there to witness it and to stare and gossip.

I feel ill.

Shortly after I returned home, someone I had bumped into in Oatlands the day before called in to have a look at the house over the road in case she wanted to buy it. Fortunately she isn't going to do that, but we did have a good long talk (OK I dumped on her) and by the time she left I was feeling better. Then them over the road called me over to tell me she had given them an earful too and to warn me she was on the rampage.

So I called the captain of the brigade and pointed out that he would be receiving a call from her soon (complaints to Council now cost $60.00) and talked the problem over with him. We reached an agreement that actually he wasn't all that concerned about my place due to the fact I was clearly making a strong effort, so hopefully I won't receive an Abatement Notice any time soon. And spent the rest of the afternoon chasing blokes to get someone in to solve the problem. I have till the end of the first week of January to sort it out. I will take the whipper snipper with me to Christmas lunch and hope the estranged husband (who is a small engine mechanic) is there. I am pretty sure it is a fuel line problem, so he should be able to sort it out without much fuss.

Tomorrow I am off to Swansea to deliver an elderly chap to the Nursing Home there for respite care which is apparently what families do to their elders in this neck of the woods.